I want to write something tonight but what? If you read any of my past blogs, you know that I have made some big mistakes and just about every thing I once I ever had, I have lost. I have always thought I was a pretty nice guy, I love to be nice to people and treat them how I would want to be treated. The one thing I was always looking for but never got a lot was love. I was always looking for someone to love me but most of the relations I had never gave me the love I was looking for. I could never understand why someone could not love me? I was a “nice” guy and it would hurt me if I ever did anything to hurt someone I loved. I just never felt loved very much and I would do any thing for it, including stealing!
I don’t how it happened but Jesus has come into my life and now I know that I am loved! When “all hell broke loose” for me it was October 29, 2007 and that was the night I was arrested and taken to the Johnson county jail. That night while in my cell I looked at a drain in the floor and all I could think of is my life is going to hell! I asked God that night to save me, looking back I didn’t know I was doing it but I knew I had 2 ways to go; one was down the drain or the other was to look up to God and pray that he would watch over me.
I only spent one night in jail and that’s all I ever want to spend ever again! When I got home I knew I would have to find a church but I was so ashamed of what I did, what church would let a theft into there building! I felt like I have lost any friends I had even made, I couldn’t face them because of what I did. I was lost and very alone, my wife said she was going to stand by me but I knew our marriage wasn’t very strong and that was even before I was arrested. She ended up filling for divorce and my only choice was to move out.
I would watch different pastors preach on TV and pray when I went to bed at night. I knew God but what I didn’t know was Jesus! Nothing good really happened to me, the only good thing was finding a good job and putting in a lot of hours working hard. Since I couldn’t face my friends I started to use facebook to make new friends. One thing I looked for in a new friends was they had to be a Christian and love God. I don’t remember how we became friends but I became friends with a lady on facebook. We chatted on acebook most nights and talked on the phone for hours and hours. She was a Angel sent for haven and I was in love, but our “relationship” didn’t last. Were still friends today and I think the world of her and it’s because of this Angel that I set foot back inside of Grace United Methodist Church for the first time in a very long time.
That was the March 7 2009 and I have been going to church ever since. I have been learning more about Jesus and less about me. All I can say is, I know Jesus loves me and SAVED! My life is not that same, I’m not who I was. Something has changed me, all I think about is how I can worship Jesus and Praise God for his Grace. I now read the Bible and have been going to a Bible study every Monday. I want everyone to know Jesus, if he can change me; then Jesus can change you too! I am so happy! Everyone at church is like family to me now. My life has changed and I have so much more I can do.
I am still learning and trying also teach at the same time. It would do no good if I keep what I have learned to myself, I freely give myself so others can learn too. Starting October I am going to do, Walk to Emmaus.
What is Emmaus?
The Walk to Emmaus is a spiritual renewal program intended to strengthen the local church through the development of Christian disciples and leaders. The program’s approach seriously considers the model of Christ’s servanthood and encourages Christ’s disciples to act in ways appropriate to being “a servant of all.”
The Walk to Emmaus experience begins with a 72-hour short course in Christianity, comprised of fifteen talks by lay and clergy on the themes of God’s grace, disciplines of Christian discipleship, and what it means to be the church. The course is wrapped in prayer and meditation, special times of worship and daily celebration of Holy Communion.
I am really for ward to this “walk”. It’s getting late and I should get some rest before work tomorrow. I will try to write more tomorrow night.