Do we love Christ or desire Him?

Love and desire are not the same.

I love chocolate cake! We often confuse the two.  When we say “I love chocolate cake!” we deceive ourselves.  We don’t love it. We want to eat it! If we loved it, we’d care for it.

 Desire is simple and often reckless.  We need to manage it carefully to avoid causing harm.  Desire is the intention to change something, to reject what it is in favor of what it could be something  better, more secure, more pleasing.  Love is the intention to let that thing be for its own sake.  Love saves and serves and sacrifices.  Desire uses and consumes.  This begs an important question for  each of us.  Do we love Christ or desire Him?  It’s not just a matter of semantics arguing over the fine definition of words.  Our answer to this basic question will indicate whether we live to serve Him or  use Him.  How often do we follow Him because of what we can get from Him rather than give to Him?  How often do we couch the gospel in terms of reward rather than repentance  what we will gain?

 To love Christ is to make Him the center of our attention, with no selfish ambition.  Do we “come to Christ” to honor Him or be honored by Him?  Love and desire are not the same, and to the extent that we confuse the two we diminish our discipleship and ourselves.  When we worship the Lord for our benefit, it inevitably becomes a source of dissatisfaction and conflict.  When we serve others to meet our need for affirmation, it eventually feels hollow.  When we pray with only our needs in focus, the words shrivel in our mouths.  Loves looks outward.  Desire looks inward.  Love gives.  Desire takes.  Love submits.  Desire controls.  Love releases.  Desire holds tight.

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.  By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”  John 13:34-35 (NIV)

We might equally ask ourselves whether our marriages are marked by love or desire; whether we treat our children with authentic love or thinly disguised desire.  But as followers of Jesus, the issue is just as critical.  Love is a gift, without strings, without expectations.

May we love Him (and those around us) more purely today.

Lookin’ for love

Tennessee Williams wrote in the Glass Menagerie, “Time is the longest distance between two places” but looking back at where I was just a few years ago seems like yesterday.   Some times I think it’s just a dream, how can someone who I can’t see, can’t touch or hear put love into my life and change me!  Being a single man wasn’t easy and even when I was married I was still “looking for love in all the wrong places” but everything I did for love just got me into trouble.

5696_105460397006_93874507006_2675602_5503512_n“I’ve spent a lifetime looking for you, Single bars and good time lovers, never true. Playing a fools game, hoping to win, Telling those sweet lies and losing again”.

It wasn’t until I lost it all that I found a friend who I could turn too.  I still remember the night I asked Jesus to come into my life, and He did.  I have never been happier, my heart is overflowing with joy and yet there are still mountains to cross but I know I am not alone any more.

“You came a’knocking at my heart’s door, You’re everything I’ve been looking for”

I know most of you don’t like “religion” and until a few years ago I was one of you!  Wikipedia describes Religion this way…

Religion is a collection of cultural systems, belief systems, and worldviews that establishes symbols that relate humanity to spirituality and, sometimes, to moral values”.

Jesus might be the symbol of being a Christian but religion has nothing to do with what happens when thing change in your life.  Religion didn’t save me, Jesus did and it’s not religion that changed my life, it’s a Relationship!

When I was alone then, no love in sight and I did everything I could to get me through the night. Don’t know where it started or where it might end I turn to a stranger, just like a friend.

You don’t have to be alone, their is a love that’s so real that nothing you can do will change your life no matter how wrong or bad it might be.  It can start today and is forever and little by little you’ll find like I did you are loved!  Jesus is no strange, He’s been waiting for you and He’s the love you’ve been dreaming of.

Life

Man, it’s been a long times since if posted any thing about me!  Life is still going on! lol  Yeah, it’s not been easy and I’ve been “burning the candle at both ends” a lot the last month.  I have been blessed with a new church, didn’t plan on changing churches, it just happened.  I been working real hard on starting up my I am second small group and maybe that’s why God lead me to St. Mark’s in Marion.  I’ve been “single” (I hate that word) now for about 2 years and I am OK with it.  I think God wants me to be single, that way I can do more for Him. lol. But I know He doesn’t want us to be alone and I keep praying for to Him that he’ll bring someone into my life.  All that I ask for is that she be a Christian and loves music, any thing else I can deal with.

Last year for my birthday, I got myself a guitar and hope to take lessons.  I wish I would have never gave it up back in JR high!  I’m just not sure that I can learn to play again!  I watch youtube videos and try but my fingers are so big, it’s not easy to finger the frets.  A week after a got my guitar, I was blessed with the opportunity to start working with one of the best country band around this area.  I am so happy to be helping Black Diamond and have the chance to learn from some of the best musicians around.  I also want to try to learn to play keyboards too but what’s been in my heart all of my life is singing!  I never thought I was good enough and until I started to sing with the choir at my old church that  I started to learn that I was wrong.  I have always dreamed of singing on stage (who hasn’t right?) but why?  It’s not about me, it’s my way of expressing what life has taught me and giving hope to others who need it.

Well, stay tuned. I’ll try to post more “Broken Road Reflection” about God, life, love.

Kent

You are loved!

This past week we had a young lady take her own life by jumping off a bridge in Iowa City onto Interstate 80 on Tuesday morning, where she was hit by a semitrailer and killed. I know what it’s like to feel so overwhelmed that you just can’t see any hope for living. Yes, I have been to that point in my life where I wanted to end it all. I felt so alone, no hope for tomorrow but that was before I found the love of Jesus Christ and my local church. I didn’t know this young beautiful lady at all but her death touched me in a way that I can’t express! That night, I just keep saying, “she didn’t have to do this” and how sad I was for her family, friends, the driver of the semi and the first responder and Law enforcement officers.

As I was on my way to church this morning, I felt God calling me to step up and talk to our congregation about what I was feeling. When we are feeling depressed, sad or what ever, we can’t go it alone and covering it up doesn’t help. I you think the person you care for knows how much you care for them, don’t just think they know! Tell them, show them ever day how much you love them no matter how bad they feel. If your dealing with depression and can talk about it, DO IT! Let’s not hide it any more, show others who are facing the same thing that they too are not alone and can come to you if they want too. Life is so wonderful, and Jesus died on the cross to give us new life and no matter what you have done or what your going through, his family of believers love you and you can trust them.

I know this is my calling to help others dealing with depression and showing them the love that Jesus Christ offers us. I am so thankful that the good Lord gave me new life and new hope so I can try to touch life’s that are hurting. Just hearing people thanks me for sharing my thoughts and experiences is nice, I hope they can take from it that it’s OK to let people see who they really are, and that’s a child of God who loves us so much that He sent his only son to die for us.

Your not alone and if you think that ending your life is all you have left, please don’t! Let me know, I will do every thing I can for you. You are loved more than you know and better days are ahead.

God bless.

Alone

I have been doing real good being alone.  Working 50 plus hours helps to take my mind off Julie.  This is the first week I have off in over 5 weeks and I sleeped all day!  Went out for dinner and then back home.  I have been getting things set up the way I like them, making it a home, LOL.  Yesterday I asked Julie to add me as a friend on facebook again and she did but then last night she removed me.  I was very hurt, I know the laptop computer I gave her is not working and I post a note that I had another power supply that should work and that she had her Dell desk top hear too.  Don’t know if she’s mad that I posted that to her wall?  I care very much for Julie and I hurt much more than what shows!  I would have never just walked out on her like she did to me.

I don’t like giving up and I need to let go of the pain Julie has caused me but giving up without talking about her problems.  She was mad that I didn’t talk about mine  and it was wrong for me to put up walls.  I am willing to talk, some times I talk too much and end up saying things that I don’t think over real good.  I miss Julie, wish I could talk right now.  I am real depressed, having some bad thoughts.  I can’t kill myself but wish I could.  I feel like you all would never care any way.  All I herd from Julie was how bad I was for her and how unhappy I made her life. 

It’s for the best that I am alone, I’m not lovable, I end up !@#$ things up any way.  I DON’T CARE ANY MORE!  I want to run and hide,  I can’t do this any more.  I have been trying so hard for so long and you just don’t see it!!!!  I did all I could for Julie, I visited her as much as I could when she was in the Abby, been with her in the hospital, cried at night when I couldn’t be with her.  I need someone who will love me back just a little, someone who cares about my feeling too.  I have a right to be who I am, even if it’s not the best I can be at the time.